hell yes lets make some ravioli
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
