drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
