the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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