I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
