And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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