Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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