So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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