sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize