Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
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