I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
