Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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