another moral hangover. fuck.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
