He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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