did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
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