Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
