She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
