we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Come share oat with me in your robe
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
