Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
