just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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