Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
