I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
