...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
