either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
