Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
