I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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