dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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