5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
