It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
