Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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