Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
