We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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