i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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