I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
