I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
