Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
