K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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