I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
