Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
