Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
you inspire me to be a worse person
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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