in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
