Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
