I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Oh god it's open bar.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
