ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
She bit a glass in half.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
