It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
