it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
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