You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
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