If that was your dad, he is hot
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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