I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
