But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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