So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize