What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
